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Penis Repellent of the Month: Sarah Jessica Parker

18 May

If Sex in the City was a real life story and Sarah Jessica Parker really got laid n’ paid like Carrie Bradshaw then…………  I would sale all my shit and move to New York!  Let’s be honest if any man would saddle up and ride that stallion, I could probably make it BIG in NYC….. (get it  – BIG)

I am sure she is just a charming breed and it’s unfortunate that she has to re-live Ferris Bueller’s Day Off  every day of her life because she married Matthew Broderick (Who was also almost nominated due to his Donald Trump comb over.) On the up side at least she has cute kids and ass loads of stylish clothes from her Sex in the City gig.

Doxy Product Review: Biore Pore Unclogging Scrub

11 May

I have used many different products on my skin (that is one perk of working in the beauty industry) but one day for shits and giggles I bought Biore Pore Unclogging Scrub for about $6, mostly because I was intrigued by the fact that is said on the bottle that it’s “clinically proven to instantly work 68% better than Proactiv”.

Biore: Our gentle but super effective scrub uses perfectly spherical beads — not jagged edges, like some competitors’ scrub ingredients — to detoxify skin. The scrub penetrates deep down where breakouts start to help prevent future ones. Show the door to pore cloggers and get ready for beautiful, clear, smooth skin.

I am in LOVE with this product! Not only is it saving me a ton of money but it has cleared up my skin! I usually get a little bit of acne on my cheeks and clogged pores on my nose but with in 2 weeks it cleared it right up. I use it once a day and make sure to apply a moisturizer afterwards and it has been a great skin care regime. The final proof was when I actually ran out of the Biore scrub and went without it for 1 1/2 weeks. My skin went to hell in a hand basket. It was horrible! Needless to say I have a supply now so that never happens again.

The Royal Wedding UGLY Hats!

29 Apr

I could care less about the Royal Wedding. There, I said it. Don’t judge me.

I don’t care what Kate Middleton decided to wear, or what compression hoses the Queen decided to go with, and I really don’t care how bald Prince William looks (okay maybe just a little) So while you crazy people got up at 3:00 a.m. to watch it on t.v. I slept soundly in my bed having sex dreams about Ian Somerhalder (I shamefully watched the damn Vampire Diaries before I went to sleep.)

However, the one thing I LOVE is people wearing ugly hats!!  I don’t care if it’s at Kentucky Derby or Westminster Abbey, I have a small orgasm over people wearing these horrid fashion accessories!  Someone at the Royal Wedding must have sent out an ugly hat text because they ugly showed up like a herps outbreak.  I threw up in my mouth a little when I saw The Princess Eugenie of York and Princess Beatrice of York. They are supposedly Valentino Couture and I am sure they paid more than my mortgage payment for them. Nice mauve fucking bow on your head.

Or how about Posh Spice aka David Beckam’s 80 lb wife aka Victoria Beckam

Just because your friends are doing it doesn’t mean you should too……. put the pretend coral reef hat down!

Avatar meets a craft store.

Kelly Osbourne Is Hot Now?

5 Apr

Do I even have to write anything? Can’t we all just look at these pictures and enjoy the fact that Kelly Osbourne no longer looks like the bat that her dad decided to chew on at a concert?

Is the 70’s Bush Back?

29 Mar

It has been brought to my attention that women are now sporting a woman goatee. I am not sure how this epidemic broke out again? I thought we had rid the world of the scavenger hunt.  In my mind I thought that every woman waxed and/or shaved their pretty kitty. Nope. With such a wide variety of hair removal options it’s hard to understand woman who choose to sit on a cushion of fur.  I still will never understand why that in the 1970’s porn made it fashionable to grow a monstrosity of hair that seemed to replicate the mane of Ron Jeremy.

Ladies, it is 2011! Could someone please make an announcement that no one and I mean absolutely no one should have a 70’s bush. Anyone? Someone with a television show? Howard Stern?  Or could we at least blast this post and flood twitter and Facebook. It’s for the good of mankind. Or at least for mankind’s penis or a lesbian love triangle.

This is a public service announcement: Wax, shave, or laser that shit ladies! At least here at The Dirty Doxy we care about you and your under carriage and we are trying to prevent you from being caught in a fury circumstance. Contact your local esthetician or exorcist and get on with your bad self!

Mandy Moore ~ Red Carpet ~ Oscars 2011

27 Feb

Our #1 Red Carpet pick for 2011 is Mandy Moore! She looks AMAZING! Love the dress from Monique Lhuillier! This picture doesn’t even do it justice!


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Boxer Dropper of the Month: Mila Kunis

26 Feb

Here at the Dirty Doxy we are not always hot headed bitches 24/7. We have a kinder more gentle side that comes out usually after sex, the husband folding laundry, or two bottles of wine. So I decided with all the shit talking gossip we blab all the time we need to show our kinder side. Now for the unfortunate few that end up on our “Vagina Repellent of the Month” you do have a chance to redeem yourselves with our new segment “Panty and/or Boxer Dropper of the Month”

Drum roll please……. our first “Boxer Dropper of the Month” goes to Mila Kunis. Yes she has horrible taste in men (See here) but for those who have seen the Black Swan you all know what I am talking about when I say she is going to be hard to dethrone!

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